So Here’s a Little About Me (In narrative form of course 
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Whenever I write about myself, I always feel like I’m writing my own personal advertisement. Well, feel is probably the wrong word. I know that I am writing my own advertisement. With that said, I will try, in my ad, to present myself in the best light. I will reveal the basic and much needed information using metaphors within metaphors in a manner that goes beyond literary standards (and probably not in a good way).
My ad begins with mundane facts like age, height and weight. This information, respectively, is 21 years old, 5 feet 4 ½ inches tall, and a few odd pounds here and there (Really, have you ever met a woman who willingly told you her weight?:) ). These facts are the bones for my own little commercial. They lend support and structure where needed. They are the need-to-know, the background information, or the police report. And, they are joined by other bones like Oklahoma City, which is where I am from. Or by bones like my majors, which are Professional Writing and English Literature.
Other bones include my writing experience, particularly the types of writing I have done. These bones are primarily metacarpals and phalanges, and consist of poetry, prose, essays, and news articles.
All of these facts or bones make up the skeleton or framework of my advertisement. But, these facts, these bones, are dry, dull and dead. They need life to make them interesting. They need a nice layer of fresh epidermis, or in other words flesh.
The flesh of my ad comes in the form of anecdotes, which serve as colorful coverings to the “basic info” aforementioned. They are the flesh on the bones. Like, for example, I’ve worked at Barnes and Noble on and off now for a few years (bone). One of my favorite nights working there was the midnight party for the seventh Harry Potter book. It was a great night because I got my copy of Deathly Hallows at midnight, and I also had an excuse to dress up as the Ford Anglia from the book (flesh).
This is how my ad unfolds. It goes from the physical to the professional and now to the personal. Now we come to my deep, dark past. Like, that my father nick-named me “the human pez dispenser.” The “meaty” detail of that bone is that when I was about two years old I thought it would be a great idea to see how many peas I could insert in my petite proboscis. My parents employed a toothpick and removed the peas one at a time. But, as one pea was taken away, another would take its place in a manner similar to a pez dispenser; the only difference was that the food was rolling to the bottom instead of springing to the top.
After mentioning my past in my ad, I think it’s important to end with my dreams of the future. These hopeful, funny bones are the weakest because, at this point, they are mere expectations. I hope, after studying in the Professional Writing program, to be a professional writer. I would place emphasis on writing books, short stories, and screenplays. And, if a publisher throws me a bone, that’s what I’ll do. Otherwise my wish bones will decay and I will find other employment. But, I can’t end my ad on that broken bone.
Instead, I will conclude with my stubbornness and optimism. Because, as long as I’ve got strong bones and tough skin, I can continue to hold on to my pen.
